Perfection Isn’t The Goal

Flowers are perfect.
Clouds are perfect.
Babies are perfect.

You and me? Not perfect.

perfection+shed+the+mask+sarah+mcdugal+authorNot when we try. Not even when our halo seems pretty convincing. Not even when we obsess on it.

Actually… probably least of all when we obsess on it. Obsessing on perfection turns us into hypocritical obnoxious snobs. The type of friends nobody wants to hang out with. The type of parents every child wishes they could trade for someone else’s. The type of spouse everyone wishes they’d seen behind the mask back when you were dating. 

That first blog post I shared, the one that ripped the mask off my survival story? It felt scary to put out there on social media, but it could have been worse. I’ll admit I went back and compulsively tweaked it for the first few days. #perfectionist

Wanna guess where it was most nerve-wracking to post? In my private Facebook group for pastor’s wives. My former peers. A support group of over a thousand ministry spouses around the world that I grew from the ground up a few years ago. That group was my baby. It was where I ministered to everyone else, without really showing what was happening with me.

Sharing the story of how my pastor’s wife life fell apart, with the group that has the capacity to stand in judgment of my imperfection the most – that was the hardest. But perfection isn’t the goal… Relationship is.

perfection+shed+the+mask+sarah+mcdugal+authorRelationship with people.
Relationship with family.
Relationship with God.

And relationships are messy. Frightening. Vulnerable.

It often seems like they’d be easier if we held each other at arm’s length and kept the masks firmly in place.

Except that then there’s no real relationship at all. The pursuit of perfection precludes all possible depth.

Which leads us to today’s question…

If you stopped caring about perfection, and invested more in relationship, who would benefit most?

Your family?
Your children?
Your spouse?
Your colleagues?

What’s holding you back?

Reprinted with permission from Sarah’s blogYou can purchase Sarah’s book here: ONE FACE: Shed the Mask, Own Your Values, and Lead Wisely.

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Sarah McDugal

Sarah McDugal is a branding strategist, leadership speaker and author. She's also a homeschooling single mom who never has enough time to do #allthethings, and sometimes leaves dirty dishes in the sink longer than she probably should.

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